48. Bad brother?

Less than two weeks till my mum return to Australia. Only less than two weeks...
I miss her a lot... I can relate to her feelings when she was still here. I was a bad daughter and I knew.
She must have been annoyed and frustrated with me. Oh my lord, how much she dealt with me is unbelievable.

I understand how she feels because I was annoyed and frustrated with my brother for teasing Benny. He didn't like my tone/attitude and went on a rampage by hitting my dog Benny. Unbelievable...
If he wanted to hit someone or something, I would prefer him to hit himself. My dogs did nothing wrong to him so why should they be my bro's punching bags? They are living creatures with emotions too! They just can't speak... I truly hate animal cruelty.

I was upset with my bro and then I heard whimpers... I looked up only to see him breaking into tears. This isn't the first time I saw him cry, and I wasn't surprised by it. He kept crying and shouting out stupid statements. He was blaming himself for being an annoying brother, for being the worst brother...

At this point, I felt like a bad person because truly in the inside, I thought, 'Now you just realised?! It's about time'. He wouldn't stop crying and that made me so annoyed. I am not your mother, I am your little sister. I am not here to babysit you, you are older than me, so grow up! I didn't give him any comfort. But because of his non-stop cries, I lied saying, "No, don't say that. You are a good person. You did nothing wrong." But he denied it and repeated his statements. Yes I agree with you bro but really, you really need to shut up because I am not in any mood to hear your winges.

At my downs, at my worsts, when I cried, where were you?! You were with mum, taking her side without listening to my side of the story and already pointing fingers at me, blaming that everything is my fault.

Why should I comfort you when you never comforted me?

All my friends told me that they are envious, and wants to have an older brother. But seriously, not all older brothers are like that. Some are cruel and don't even care about your life.

Who gave us the rule that just because we share the same blood as our parents that we must respect and love our siblings? Hell no. If your siblings don't treat you the way they should treat you, I don't even call that as a sibling.

There are siblings that don't get along and hate each other. Sad but true fact.

Yeah, yeah, family is important but really. It's only important to you if they also think you're important to them too. To make family relationships to work, both sides must understand, respect and commit themselves to each other. It never works with just one-side.


Why do I not get along with my bro?...... It was never like this before.... As we grew up, we were distant because we are different genders. He stayed away from me a lot back in high school. He was embarrassed because of me. He didn't like people misunderstanding us as they thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend. We even grew more apart when he found his hobby of dancing and I don't have mine. Then it hit us, when he took sides with my mum and fought against me. He wasn't there for me anymore... We now sometimes fight each other and I hate fighting...

Why do I not get along with my bro?....
Aah... the answer is simple.... its because I'm a bad sister...

Why am I a bad sister?

............



I'm not a good sister, good daughter, or a good friend....... I'm not a good person.....
I'm not nice........